I’ve been suffering from a huge creative block over the past few weeks. In fact, since finishing my writing course I haven’t been able to look at my work in progress. And I can’t really put my finger on why.
Maybe because I know it’s so close to ready, yet also so far. Things are coming together, and with one last tremendous effort I know it could be done. Ready to put out to a handful of beta readers for feedback and then ready for another redraft, then structural edit and then copy edit. See. So close, yet so far.
I think too, mabye it’s the worry that it will never be perfect. I know, whatever is perfect? But as a writer, you want it to be perfect. Accepting that it will never be, that every time you pick it up to read it, you’ll find something you could have done bettter, is hard.
But if I don’t put it out there, I’ll never know. And it’s my first full manuscript. And I know that first manucripts are rarely published. It’s like the breaking of the horse. The making of a writer. Finishing that first draft and seeing it through to completion, and putting it out there. Only once it’s done, can you properly move on.
Something that’s also been playing on my mind is a story I wrote, or started writing, gosh, maybe ten years ago. It was my first attempt at a first draft and it was pretty bad, but some of it was pretty damn good too. And for some reason it’s been playing on my mind. Screaming to be finished and put to bed.
So, I’m playing with an idea. An idea that will hopefully both break my creative drought and bring some closure to that very first manuscript.
What if I released it here? On the blog. As a novella. A short novel of about 40,000 words.
Of course I’d have to go through and tidy it up, edit and actually finish the last few chapters. But then I could release it here to you, my lovely blog readers. Not for a price, just as a gift for supporting me along my journey and into the future.
There’s both pros and cons in doing so. I know that. But maybe, it’s all part of the path. I’d love to know your thoughts.
What do you think?
Would you be interested in reading my very first fiction?